When we are studying how to get the cooperation of the people, the principle adopted by Harji Sheth is particularly worth understanding. This principle and its implementation are quite simple, yet most people do not use it. However, for Harji Sheth, this principle had become part of his blood.
Harji Sheth was famous as a lumberjack. His business was in building timber. Although there were many other lumberjacks in the city, Harji Trikam & Sons was the leader. His business was booming. He did not have the practice of haggling or borrowing money there, yet he had the most customers in the city. Customers used to come to him from the surrounding talukas and villages as well. Once a customer bought wood from Harji Sheth, he had a habit of not going anywhere else.
What was the secret behind this? The secret was that Harji Seth would always call everyone who had visited him by name. It may seem like a simple thing, but its effect was extraordinary. If a carpenter went to a merchant to buy firewood, he would be welcomed by saying ‘Come, carpenter’. In some cases, the merchant would not even recognize the carpenter, as this customer had bought from him before.
Whereas Tribhuvan Das was different. On seeing the customer, he would immediately realize that this man had bought from him before. Not only that, if he remembered his name, instead of calling someone ‘Mistri’, he would welcome them directly by name, saying ‘Come, Vanmalibhai’ or ‘Come, Chandubhai’. Due to which every person who came felt that Harji Seth knew him personally! The amazing thing is that even after making a purchase once, if a person goes there even after four years, Harji Sheth will call them by name. As a result, the customer immediately realizes that Sheth has not forgotten us.
Imagine if four years ago you had gone there with your friend to visit one of his relatives and today suddenly that relative met you on the road and addressed you by your name, how happy would you be?
Due to this habit of Harji Sheth, customers would come back to him again and again. Because they were called by name there. People felt a sense of belonging there, due to which Tribhuvan Sheth’s business was booming. The most beloved word of every person is his name. Oh, if you call even a dog by its name, it will come running and love you.
Every person wants to be known by everyone by name. A person has a special kind of love for himself and his identity. So if you recognize him by his name and call him by his name, he feels very good.
If you also want to achieve great popularity, then start remembering people’s names and calling them by their names. If you recognize someone at a wedding or any other event and happily ask him, “How are you? Having fun?”, it will seem formal, but if you ask him instead, “How are you, Parulben? Having fun?”, it will not seem formal. It will show more personality. It will show more closeness. And the other person will really respect you.
My book ‘Yadshakti’ has become very popular. Do you know which chapter is the favorite of most people? It is – “How to remember people’s names and faces?” The art of remembering people’s names is really worth learning.
Our former Health Minister, former Speaker of Gujarat Legislative Assembly and MLA from Khadia for six consecutive sessions, the late I was very close to Mr. Ashok Bhatt. He also had an amazing ability to remember people’s names. And that is why he was so successful, loved and respected by people.
Mr. Govindbhai Dholakia, a prominent industrialist from Hira, Surat, also remembers everyone he comes in contact with by name, calls them by name. When I get a call from him, he remembers every member of his family by name. “How is Bhanuben doing?” “What’s the news from Nimishbhai?”, “Is Nehaben having fun?” etc., using names increases closeness. Calling someone by their name is like greeting them.
Jim Farley, who helped Roosevelt a lot in becoming the President of America, never went to school. Yet, by the age of 45, four colleges had awarded him honorary degrees. He also became the head of the Democratic National Party. Do you know his greatest talent? He could call about 50,000 people by their first name.
The more people we know by name, the more people we become dear to us and because of that we get good cooperation from them without any extra effort.
I visit a friend of mine living in Mumbai once a year or a year and a half. When I am there, I am treated very well by his cook. I have especially noticed that he takes more care of me than his close relatives or other friends. Because other people call him only as ‘Maharaja’ when I call him by his name. That makes him very happy. Who does not love his own name?
I have often seen that people rarely know even the watchman of their house, society or flat by name. Even if he has work, they call him by saying “That watchman, come here” or “That watchman, do this!” He is a watchman, so by calling him a watchman, by assigning him a job, he will do it, but if instead we address him by his name, then his self-respect is preserved and we gain a place in his heart.
Servants like driver, servant, gardener should also be addressed by their names. Because he is not a driver, he does the work of a driver. He is not a servant, he does the work of a servant. He is not a gardener, he does the work of a gardener. Driver, servant or gardener are his areas of work. That person is a human being. A human being just like us. And his phobia has also given him names, so why not call him by his name?
But yes, if you have to call him by his name, you should know the correct name and call him. When any person hears his name being pronounced incorrectly, he really gets angry. Many people remember the name but remember half-heartedly, due to which the game gets spoiled. Let the name be Rajendrabhai and call him Rajeshbhai. Let the name be Balwant and call him Baldev. If you have to remember the name, then remember the real name.
A workshop of a trainer friend of mine started. The registration of the names of new participants was going on outside at the registration counter. And each person was being given a name tag with his name. One of them was from South India, he had his name written as Mr. Kumar. And when he got his name tag, it had ‘Kumarbhai’ written on it. After reading that, he got annoyed. And started saying angrily. “I am not a brother, I… write the name correctly.”
Many people also make a fuss about my surname. The surname is ‘Adhiya’. Yet many people say ‘Adia’, some say ‘Hadia’, some say ‘Adhiya’ and in foreign countries, some even say ‘Idea’. While writing my last name on the phone, I have to be very careful and pronounce it clearly, but sometimes if the person on the other side doesn’t understand, I jokingly say, “Bhai, two whole and one half means two and a half, and if you add a ya after it, it will be written two and a half. Got it?!”
If you are doing any business, then remember the names of all the people associated with your work. If we cannot remember even those people’s names, then we should understand that we are failing to remember an important part of our business. The main part of any business is the people associated with it.
Some people make very good use of the attachment that people have with their names. Someone once told me that a young entrepreneur in Sweden had to set up a new factory. For that, he needed a lot of capital, and it was not possible to get a loan from the banks, but even his rich friends showed their inability to help him. Then he announced that I would name my company after the person who would lend me the entire amount to set up my factory. And instead of one, two friends were ready for that. What a creative idea!
We also see many such examples where people donate lakhs and crores of rupees to an organization on the condition of giving their name. Even when two companies merge, both companies want their names to remain.
Most people do not know which god is in the Birla Temple in Delhi, but still how popular is the Birla Temple? It is said that “Where did I put my name?” But now you have come to know how big the magic of a name is.
People want their name to be printed somewhere, their name to be announced from some stage, their name to be in some book. Even after their departure, their name is used and mentioned. So if you remember people’s names and call them by their names. Then he will feel very good and his cooperation will always be good.
Many people complain that, – “I can’t remember people’s names.” But this is an excuse. Those people never make a systematic effort to remember people’s names. If you want to remember people’s names, then do this, – Know their name on the first meeting, use that name two-four times during your conversation with them, at that time observe their face closely, take a good note of their nose, ears, eyes, etc. The next day after separation, pronounce their name in your mind, remember their face clearly with your eyes closed, continue pronouncing their name in your mind, remember all the fine details of their face, and then write their name on a piece of paper and tear that piece, the name will be remembered.
When you call someone by their name, you indirectly tell them that you know them, that you accept their personality, respect them and appreciate them.
So start today…
Recognizing people by name and addressing them by their name.
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